Sunday, March 15, 2009

My Brain is Like a Really Slow Computer...

Dawn finally arrived at about 4 PM and I immediately thought she looked familiar. She pulled up in her shiny new Lexus with a 2 year old Great Dane in the back seat, named Zoie. Zoie hopped out and my Zoie immediately fell in love with her. I knew then they would be great friends, but now it was time to concentrate on the owners.

We went to our local park, but my Zoie was a little standoffish, as I think she was tired from our morning outing. Eventually, my girl started running and playing, but soon hurt her rear leg and I had to put a stopper on her fun. She was competing with a 2 year old at her advanced age of 10. We finally headed back to the house for some cold water and conversation. The young Zoie climbed up on the sofa and put her head on my lap, as I melted. NOT getting another Great Dane is going to be pretty difficult, I can see. Dawn stayed about an hour and we chatted, she gave me a hug and left. I continued my usual Sunday night watching 60 Minutes and a little other TV. Suddenly, I think it was about 9:45 when my brain finally gave me the answer I was looking for! I had dated Dawn before!

The year was 1993 and I had recently divorced my second wife and still thanking God for getting me out of that marriage with my sanity and not doing much else, when my former son Brad saw a commercial for Great Expectations on late night TV. He told me about the professional dating service and reminded me that the chance of me meeting a potential mate right here in my house was rather remote. I called the service and found out it would cost me almost as much as the down payment on my first house, but I caved and wrote the check. Loneliness is expensive.

I fell into their system and dated a few of the members, but quickly learned that this was not going to be the answer and slowly backed off. One day, minding my own business, I received a little pink card in the mail saying there was a woman that was interested in meeting me. I drove to their location in old Scottsdale and viewed a 32 year old attractive girl named Dawn. I agreed to meet with her and her phone number was offered. I called and made a date with her, in spite of the fact that I was 47, 15 years her senior. I picked her up and we drove to Harold's in Cave Creek and ate Mexican pizza and drank beer. I took her home and remember making out with her before leaving, but for some reason I decided she wasn't right for me and didn't call her again.

The next time I heard from Dawn was when I was home one night the following week and she called me from a bar just blocks from my house. She sounded drunk, but I was no slouch back then and could handle my share of the booze. When I walked in, she was drunker than 15 Indians and the bar tender approached me and asked me to get her out of there. I promised I'd try. Being the gallant gentleman, I offered to take her home to my house and give her some food to try to sober her up. She agreed wholeheartedly and collapsed into my arms, after which I carried her out and secured her at my home where I knew she'd be .....ahem..... safe! I recall heating up some leftover spaghetti and trying to get her to eat it, but she decided to try to go swimming instead. Eventually I carried her up the stairs to my bedroom where she could sleep it off. The rest of the night isn't too memorable, but she did have a world class hangover the following morning. I don't think I ever saw Dawn again after that, until today... Small town, huh?

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